By James Broughton, August 11, 2022
The great escape artist or the great escape? Pierre Gasly is metaphorically imprisoned to the Red Bull F1 driver dungeon, where most F1 aspirations go to die. Gasly has long harbored a return to the Red Bull F1 A squad, when he did get a chance the pressure got to him and he was sent packing to the Red Bull gulag, otherwise known as Alpha Tauri. There he exists in a state of denial for he has identified with his Red Bull F1 captors, Gasly is suffering from Stockholm Syndrome. Gasly’s hopes for freedom have been raised by the fantasy F1 Oscar Piastri saga, a mad, mad, mad contractual tug of war between Alpine and McLaren.
Piastri is an untested talent who has never raced in Formula One, yet he is at the center of a next-generation storm. He is an Alpine protege who has shown his loyalty to be nothing other than a middle finger. The rumors are pointing to Piastri ending up in the high court first before he joins McLaren. Alpine expected Piastri to fill Alonso’s now vacant seat, Piastri showed his backers the middle finger.
As the F1 crazy season is for once actually very crazy, Pierre Gasly has been quietly tunneling his way out of the Red Bull driver dungeon, perhaps to meet up with Alpine. But unfortunately, Mad Dog Helmut Marko was alerted to suspicious activity at the Red Bull driver’s dungeon and discovered Gasly’s tunnel. The Mad Dog refuted claims that Gasly has an exit clause. During a recent media interview, the Mad Dog said:
“There is no exit clause for Gasly, there was none before the summer break and there will be none after the summer break.”
“It makes no sense for Red Bull to let Pierre go. If a Red Bull driver fails, there is no other adequate driver who can step in. Only Gasly can do that.”
“Pierre is very talented. He thinks everything through carefully and is very focused. With the right car, he can be at the forefront. That is our job now.”